I had the idea for Lockdown a few years back when I needed to create a logline for a screenwriting class. The logline I submitted for that assignment goes like this:
“After receiving a threatening call at her school, a teacher is forced to cooperate with the unknown caller to buy enough time to protect her students from a terror attack.“
Since taking Scriptfella‘s course, however, I try to avoid the clause opening. Dom Morgan (AKA Scriptfella) argues that the clause opening makes it hard to visualise. We have to get too far into the version above before we have the concrete visual of a teacher.
The version I arrived at gives that visual information straight away, enabling the reader to immediately see the exchange-teacher in their mind’s eye.
Lockdown
A young exchange‑teacher trapped in a lockdown must cooperate with a hostile caller as she hunts her own past for why she’s been targeted.
I like the added detail of the protagonist being an exchange-teacher. It implies she is a fish out of water, meaning she is not as comfortable in the world of the story.
Over the next year, I’ll post a logline a week. I’m calling the series of posts 50 Loglines in 50 Weeks.
If you’re reading this, I encourage you to do a similar thing yourself. You don’t have to post them, but it’s a good discipline to develop.